Un-Belize-able

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After a late afternoon flight and an eye opening cab ride thru Belize City, my adventure begins. Instead of taking another short flight from Belize City to Ambergris Caye, I opt for the water taxi.

The flight might have been the wiser choice. I was greeted with 40 mph winds, choppy waves, and an hour and a half ride in the dark. Riding in a tin can of a boat that felt more at ease launching itself airborne over the waves than maneuvering through them left me nauseous for two days.

On the plus side, I was befriended by a Belizean man named Jaimé. Despite not speaking a lick of English, he was bound and determined to carry on a conversation with me. His wife played the reluctant role of translator. He also brought a cold 6 pack which he kindly shared. Nothing breaks the language barrier better than a cold beer. And just like that, I’m making friends!

Ambergris Caye

Pronounced am-BUR-gris KEE, it is the largest island of Belize. It is roughly 25 miles long, and 1 mile wide. San Pedro is the only town on the island, with a population approaching 17,000. Yet somehow, there are seemingly 20,000 golf carts.

Parham Plaza

The extent of my Belize pre-planning was to book my first 3 weeks stay at Parham Plaza. A recently converted hostel, this hotel is located directly across from Central Park and the water taxi terminal right in the heart of San Pedro.

I spent a lot of time on this 3rd floor terrace. It was mere steps from my room and I was virtually the only one who ever used it. My very own extended living space – not a bad work environment!

Needless to say, I took a few siestas in this bad boy!

Staying for such an extended period of time, a major factor of my overall happiness was going to hinge on my accommodations. The central location, recent updates, the third floor terrace, and a reasonable price were the main reasons I chose to stay here. Prior to arriving, I worried if I had made the right choice. I can now say that I definitely did. My expectations were exceeded.

Chicken Drop

Thursday night is the famous Chicken Drop at Wahoo’s Lounge on the beach. At 7 pm, and then numerous times after, a chicken is brought out by “Chicken Security”.

The chicken is then spun around by someone in the crowd, shaken a few times, and then placed on a board with 100 different numbers on it.

The chicken wanders around looking a bit shell shocked and hopefully poops on a number. People place bets by picking a number on the board. If it lands on your number, you win. I’ll end the suspense – I didn’t win.

Secret Beach

Located on the northwestern harbor side of Ambergris Caye, you’ll find the best swimming beach on the island – Secret Beach. To get there from town requires a 40 minute golf cart ride on a mostly bumpy pothole filled dirt road. Unlike the Caribbean side of the island which has lots of sea grass due to the coral reef system, Secret Beach is blessed with crystal clear waters.

Perhaps it would be more aptly named Hard To Get To Beach or Worst Kept Secret Beach. Either way, it’s definitely worth the trip and is a great place to spend a day.

Barrier Reef

The biggest attraction in Belize is the coral reef. The Belize Barrier Reef is the second largest coral reef system in the world. I considered getting scuba certified but ultimately decided to just snorkel.

Here’s a compilation of my snorkeling trips to Hol Chan Marine Reserve, Shark Ray Alley, and Mexico Rocks.

Random / Misc

Caye Caulker

A 30 minute water taxi ride south of Ambergris Caye, takes us to another island – Caye Caulker. It may be the little sister island to Ambergris Caye, but it boasts a distinct personality all its own. A generally less expensive island with a reggae vibe, it tends to cater to backpackers and a younger party crowd. I spent an afternoon exploring the island.

The island is divided in two. Almost everything is on the southern side. The area dividing the island is called…what else…”The Split”. This is a gathering place for sun worshipers and party goers.

Street meat? Yes please. I get some bbq chicken before my water taxi ride back to Ambergris Caye.

San Ignacio

After a couple days spent in Guatemala around Christmas, I make my way back to Belize. Unlike the quick and painless crossing into Guatemala, the border crossing into Belize was brutal. It included a broken down bus, a walk to the border, and standing in line for 2 hours baking in the mid-day sun.

Finally across the border, everyone was still waiting around for another bus to arrive. I had very little patience left for that, so I instead arrange a 20 minute taxi ride to my next stop – San Ignacio.

Hostel Experience

Seeing as how I don’t have to work for a few more days, it makes my traveling decisions easier. I’m also able to take a few more risks. In this case, that means a stay at Bella’s Backpackers.

Built more like a glorified tree house with completely open shared spaces. This hostel is known for it’s social environment. They even had communal dinners. Feeling like I needed some social interaction, this is what drew me to stay here.

The beds on the other hand are maybe the worst on the planet. Who doesn’t like a concave mattress with every spring pressing into your back?

With a full hostel, finding shower time is difficult. I relegated myself to the rooftop outdoor shower. Not only did I not fit, but freezing cold water and a surprise greeting by a large lizard made the shower more like a quick rinse.

I didn’t know staying at this hostel would be such an adventure. If you can get past the grittiness of the accommodations, it is a great place to meet and hang out with fellow like-minded travelers.

ATM Cave

Short for Actun Tunichil Muknal, locals simply call it the ATM Cave. This is an all day excursion I’ve been really excited about. They no longer allow cameras on this tour, so along with some stock photos I’m going to have to paint a picture with words.

After an hour drive into the jungle on the worst dirt road imaginable, we arrive at the drop off point. Our guide leads us on a 30 minute hike further into the jungle. Along the way there are 3 river crossings, 1 of which we need to completely swim across. This brings us to the mouth of the cave.

There’s only one way in.


This cave system runs 30+ miles, much of which has yet to be explored. Today we are are merely exploring the first mile. This fully immersive caving experience requires both swimming and rock climbing. We traverse ankle deep water at times and swim through deep pools during others.

One of the trickiest areas of the cave came when we had to squeeze through a crack in a lengthy section of rock – in neck deep water. I just barely fit. If you’re claustrophobic, this place is your worst nightmare.

From there, we rock climb up over a small waterfall that opened up to a large cathedral like cavern. Calcified deposits hang from the wall and ceilings.

Further in the cave we were asked to take our shoes off to help preserve the delicate soils. From there we continue to rock climb another 100 vertical feet – barefoot! That was not easy! It is here, high up within the cave, a special room exists where human sacrifices once occurred.

Signs of Mayan presence are all around with rock art, pottery remnants, and a fully preserved calcified skeleton dated at over 1200 years old.

The same thought kept creeping into my head. There’s zero chance a tour like this would be possible in the US. First, because of the liability. Second, because we were allowed to climb over and touch many of these incredible rock formations, and come within inches of these artifacts.

This was my kind of excursion. It had a little bit of everything. Hiking, swimming, rock climbing, caving, and history. A real life Indiana Jones kind of adventure. These photos and my feeble words don’t do it justice. This was easily the best thing I did in Belize, and that is saying something.

Other Mainland Adventures

I met Justin during trivia night at Crazy Canucks – an expat beach bar in San Pedro. He’s a Canadian who has been coming to Belize for many years. He had some business on the mainland and asked if I wanted to tag along. We discussed including an excursion or two then decided to make a day of it.

We walk to the airport in the morning and hop on a plane to Belize City.

From here we have access to a vehicle that is parked at the airport. That’s convenient!

Cave Tubing

After Justin finished his business in the capital city of Belmopan, we decide to go cave tubing.

Our guide worked pretty hard to keep us entertained.

Cave tubing – a unique and relaxing experience. We did learn about the region and the cave systems, however, following the slow pace of the river made it conducive to simply lay back, zone out, and take in all of the incredible sights along the way.

Belize Zoo

The Belize Zoo is home to more than 175 animals, all native to Belize. This small zoo is woven entirely into the natural environment. Gravel trails and dirt walkways pave the way through the jungle and thick vegetation.

It was a very quick stop at the small but unique Belize Zoo. We had to rush to get back or risk missing the last flight of the day back to Ambergris Caye (which we nearly did).

Food & Culture

If you haven’t done much international travel but would like to ease yourself into it, Belize has a very low barrier to entry.  And by that I mean – it’s a small country which is easy to navigate (via bus, plane, or car), English is the first language, and US currency is widely accepted and has a 2:1 conversion ratio with the Belizean dollar. It can’t get much easier.

When I think of Central America I don’t necessarily think of food. Belize is very much a rice and beans culture (which is good), but you can certainly find other good food options. Here are just a few of my favorites.

Stew chicken with rice (simmered in coconut milk) and beans and slaw.

Wild Mangos – ate here quite a few times.

Nook – restaurant next to Parham Plaza. Charming place with good food.

Iguana Juan’s – one of the best meals I had in San Pedro. Plus dessert (next)

This stand doesn’t look like much but they make some pretty good tacos

Elvi’s Kitchen – a restaurant with sand floors. A little pricey but very tasty.

Truck Stop food trucks. Can’t go wrong here!

I could’ve posted a ton of pics here but you get the point. Although in my opinion Belize has some very good food, after 7 weeks I was finding myself eager to come back to the US simply for more food options.

Wrap Up

After a slightly rough (and nauseous) start, it was pretty much smooth sailing. Having said that, my trip ended much like it began – with a rough water taxi ride.

Sadly, when I arrived in Belize I purchased a round trip ticket with the water taxi company that had left me nauseous after my first ride. If I had known the return trip was going to be in an even smaller uncovered boat, I would’ve bought another ticket with a different company.

The windy and sea sprayed trip left everyone half soaked and pretty angry by the end of the ride. Not exactly what you are looking for when you have to spend the remainder of the day on a plane. I guess I should be thankful it didn’t also start raining, which it looked like it might.

Somehow this seems to be a fitting way to end this trip and bring it full circle – albeit in extremely irritating fashion.

Why did I choose Belize? I could’ve gone to any number of warm beautiful places, parked my butt on a beach somewhere, and sipped fruity drinks for 7 straight weeks. Worse things could happen!

Don’t get me wrong – while I certainly did do some of that in Belize, it’s just not really my style for an extended period of time. I prefer to mix it up. That includes finding plenty of opportunities for activity and adventure. This is where Belize excels.

After spending nearly 2 months here, it’s a bit difficult to sum all of it up into one blog post. And that’s not for a lack of trying. But if I had to boil it down into just one word – Un-Belize-able!